Right Up My Ali

Waiting for my ride to work this morning, I noticed a little old lady power walking across the street with an umbrella.  We’ve been experiencing a serious heat wave in Baltimore so I definitely did not judge her for shielding her face from the scorching sun.  As she neared me I smiled my usual good morning smile and she stopped in her tracks and asks me point blank “So be honest, how ridiculous do I look?”  I burst into laughter as this was NOT what I was expecting to come out of her mouth.  I told her she looked more comfortable than the woman walking her dog across the street and that I see Asians do it all the time so she must be on to something.  She told me she was power walking to her computer class so she could learn how to email her family that lives in various parts of the world – the long distance was getting way too expensive! Anyhow, her name is Lila and I think we’re going to be walking buddies.  Who knew I had such a little gem living right around the corner and what a sweet Friday surprise.

“And they were canopied by the blue sky, so cloudless, clear, and purely beautiful . . .” ~ Lord Byron

Trying to figure out what to put on your Grooveshark playlist today??? Let me help you out:

Animal – Mike Snow

Sylvia – Mike Snow

She Moves In Her Own Way – The Kooks

Shine On – The Kooks

Zebra – Beach House

Wraith Pinned to the Mist and Other Games – The Montreal

Dog Days Are Over – Florence and the Machine

You’ve Got the Love – Florence and the Machine

The Way We Get By – Spoon

Out of My Head – Fastball

Black Like Me – Spoon

Daylight – Matt & Kim

Kathleen – Josh Ritter

Fake Empire – The National

If It’s Not With You – Phoenix

Sir Duke – Stevie Wonder (make sure you play this towards the end of the day…it will take place of a coffee fix)

There’s a reason women loved the book Eat. Pray. Love. It may be chic lit but it’s well written and appeals to anyone who’s ever felt lost. Mushiness aside, they cast Julia Roberts as the lead in the film, which comes out in August 13th, and while I don’t usually love her (like the rest of the world) she’s perfect for this character.  While you’re waiting for the movie to come out check out the song they’ve been using in the trailer.  It’s a good hump day treat and odds are you’ll have it on repeat until someone asks you if you’ve been playing the same song over and over.

..is worth celebrating.  It is the one day out of the year when acquaintances, friends, family, teammates, classmates, coworkers old and new come out of the wood work to wish you the best.  I woke up today like any other day.  I got up to get some water, looked out the window to make sure the sun was out (it was – phew), stretched my arms and in the mirror I saw the same person I’ve seen for the past 27 years.  Yup.  I look, feel, talk, act, play the same way I did yesterday and the day before and the day before.

I’ve been on this earth 27 years but there are times when my spirit feels like a 7 year old skipping around my yard trying to catch frogs barefoot wearing overalls.  With every passing year I feel just a little bit more wise and a little more grateful but really what I feel is exactly the same.   I wonder what teenagers think when they see me.  I wonder if they think I’m someones mom.  I’m no longer their peer but it feels like  just last week that my friends and I were driving around town in our SUVs putting beer cans in people’s nativity scenes.  I bump into (literally) college kids and although I can’t hang like I used to I get flash backs of dollar dares, late night pizza, and blasting Britney Spears Toxic with all the windows open while drinking brass monkeys on a Tuesday night just because we could.  I’m pumped about not being fresh out of college but I know too well the surprise Sunday dread and the monotony of a 5-day work week.

As I got in the shower today I thought back about where I thought I’d be at 27 six years ago.  The great thing is, no matter where I thought I’d be living, what I thought I’d be doing and who I thought I’d be married to (with kids) – I never dreamed I’d be this content.  FYI, life keeps getting better.

The first thing I heard this morning was “Happy Birthday” and I hope it is the last thing I hear before I fall asleep.  There is something about those two words that brings a smile to my face.   Some people don’t like birthdays but that will never be me.  NO WAY.  NOT NEVAH.  How could I ever dislike a day that calls for celebration?

Thank you to everyone for making this special Monday birthday so great.

The Japanese really have it right.  Not only do they have the best food in the world, they also have the best candy!

These “Milkita” treats are given as a little take home at a local sushi restaurant.  Yep, milk flavored candy.  Am I supposed to take a lactaid before I enjoy one??  Although the regular milk is probably the most delicious, I think chocolate milk’s packaging best describes my sensibility.  I believe he’s (she’s?) fist pumping while jumping in the air – all the while straight faced. YUUUUUUUUUUUUP

The Hills came and went and left you feeling like a flavorless piece of chewed gum.  Now chew on this:

Lauren Conrad: $75,000 per episode ($1.4 million per year)
Heidi Montag: $65,000 per episode ($1.25 million per year)
Spencer Pratt: $65,000 per episode ($1.25 million per year)
Audrina Patridge: $35,000 per episode ($665,000 annually)
Whitney Port: $20,000 per episode ($380,000 per season)
Brody Jenner: $10,000 per episode ($190,000 a year)
Lauren “Lo” Bosworth: $10,000 per episode ($190,00 for The Hills Season 4)
Stephanie Pratt: $8,000 per episode ($152,00 for Season 4)

If that doesn’t make you feel like something is definitely wrong with humanity I don’t know what will.

So I missed the entire season of The Hills but I’ve seen enough episodes in the past to get the jist.  Every time I watch, I bitch and moan that it’s not real and the acting is horrible and it’s not a reality show blah blah blah.  If you want reality watch The Biggest Loser, Intervention, or Iron Chef.  Even the Real World is more believable than this crap.  This all being said, I’m a complete hypocrite and ashamed of the comments that came out of the mouths of me and my roommates last night while watching the finale.

“I’m pretty sure the plot between Heidi and her family is real.  Stephanie Pratt told me.”

“I just got goosebumps and a little teary eyed.”

“I kind of like Stephanie’s motocross boyfriend.  I feel like he’s good for her.”

“My boyfriend thinks Audrina’s hot but Perez says she has ceiling eyes so I don’t get it and she’s not as hot as Kristen and Lo is definitely the least hot.”

“Brody MIGHT be the biggest douche lord ever but he really is smokin’ hot”

“I think Kristen is crying real tears.”

“How does she have money to go to Europe? Like what does she do??”

Recap ladies and gentleman? We were all duped.  Every Tuesday night for the last 4 years the whole thing was fake as “revealed” by People.com.

“The show’s stars and crew watched the final scene, in which Kristin says a tearful goodbye to Brody presumably for good, before it’s revealed that it was all shot on the back lot of a studio, implying that the show is no more real than Hollywood blockbuster.”

Wait, so Kristen isn’t moving to Europe and upset that Brody is dating Avril? Of course she isn’t.  But those tears!  And is Lo really moving in with Scott and is Audrina taking time away from guys all together?  Who the hell knows…or cares??

What’s real and what’s fake?  There’s really no answers because nothing is real anymore.  I’m convinced Kristen isn’t even real and we’re watching her Avatar.

The moral of the story is stick to dramas and sitcoms because at least then you don’t feel like you’ve been lied to and cheated on.

Dear MTV – besides 16 and Pregnant (which IS reality), I’m breaking up with you for good.  This is probably one of those relationships I let go to long and now it’s just bitter.  I’m just sayin’.

What happens right before you turn 30?? I’m not quite there yet, but I’ve had a little taste.  It’s called Senior Slump.  We’ve all experienced it, whether in high school, college or both.  We start to care a little bit less about school, get a little less enthusiastic about going to class and overall we’re just lazy.  Before you jump to conclusions, I’m not saying everyone in their late 20’s is lazy.  Many of us really start to kick it up a notch, getting engaged, really getting after it in our jobs, planning weddings, even families!! The laziness occurs in our social lives.  We’re so focused on so many other important things that we’re starting to forget what we’re capable of.

I experienced this first hand this weekend at a golf tournament at the beach.  I was there with my boyfriend (28) and his friends from college (25-29) and I would say there were about 8-10 of us.  The rest of the party was either 45-60 or 18-22 – two very DIFFERENT demographics.  So here we are…sipping our vodka sodas, when a cougar approaches my boyfriend to shotgun a beer saying she doesn’t remember the last time she’s lost.  He looks at me and I’ve already got the video rolling so he knows there’s no turning back.  After he completely crushes her without flinching she skulks away and he fist pounds the 50 something guy behind the bar (don’t worry it’s all on tape). Since he looks like he’s about to pass out I suggest we  go play some beer pong with the youngins.  We take 5 steps over to the table and we are quickly diverted by Chris (28) because “we are just way to old to be over there”.  We turn back to the tent where our parents are and they’re ALL over the dance floor.  They briefly look up at us and ask “aren’t you guys going out or something?”  I mean we should have, but we just weren’t “feeling it”.  I’m pretty sure they were ready to swing and wanted us out of sight.

So there we were.  A bunch of late 20 somethings lost in limbo.  Too lazy to let our hair down, get in a cab and go to the bar and too worried about a hangover to chug just one more beer with a bunch of college kids.

From what I’ve seen, I’m pretty sure that everything starts to really happen when you turn 30.  The laziness/fear will subside and we’ll be back to our normal selves.  Chugging beers, waking up with headaches, and not worrying about what tomorrow will bring….right?  Until then, we’re stuck deciding whether or not it’s a good idea to mix a couple glasses of wine with a night cap scotch because of a meeting we have the next day.  Sounds like a blast to me!

Good thing I’ve got another week of 26

My mood wasn’t necessarily “happy” but this streaming music put me in a great mood.

http://stereomood.com/mood/happy

You’ll thank me.

Had my first taste of Louis XII last night and I think I’m in love.  At first whiff it doesn’t smell like something that’s going to be smooth but let me tell you…it’s the real deal.  After falling hard for this delicious treat I was told how much one ounce of it cost and I was quickly brought back to the earth…where I drink Bud Lights.  I guess if I had things like this all the time I wouldn’t appreciate as much?  That’s what poor people say I think.

Do people still drink it is the real question.  I mean, I know it’s awesome but does the world remember?? The stuff has been around forever and I think with the help of Jay-Z and maybe Ashton Kutcher’s twitter, Remy Martin can be THE drink to have. 

“Cognac “is a classy, sophisticated and really smooth thing to drink,” says rap star Jay-Z. His new Manhattan club, 40/40, features a “Remy room” in honor of his own favorite cognac brand, Remy Martin. He says he likes to sip Remy Martin’s Louis XIII — which comes in a gold-encrusted Baccarat crystal bottle for $5,000 — “whenever I wanna have a really relaxing moment, usually with a cigar.”

Welp, until I win the Power Ball or invent something I will be sticking with Johnnie Walker when I’m in the mood for something smoky.